Writer’s Digest 93rd Annual Competition Inspirational/Spiritual Essay First-Place Winner: “Mystical Messages”

Congratulations to Grace Ryan, first-place winner in the Inspirational/Spiritual Essay category of the 93rd Annual Writer's Digest Writing Competition. Here's her winning essay, "Mystical Messages."

by Grace Ryan

The comforting serene feeling Hayley got from inhaling the scent of freshly washed bedlinen, created a much-needed balance to the feeling of isolation and sadness that had been dominating her thoughts that Saturday. The warm humid weather had lent itself well to drying her bedlinen outdoors. There was something about sheets dried in that fashion that just gave them an extra softness. She inhaled deeply and felt the scent of sensitive skin washing detergent calm her mind.

Every object in her room seemed to come alive. The Buddha statue smiled peacefully towards the air. The rose gold heart ornament, seemed like it was emitting a real throbbing rhythm. The painting of the female tribe members, swimming in a natural forest pond, felt as if the water ripples were moving. The bubbles rising in her glass of water had a sporadic rhythm that caught her attention. The rosemary incense had burned out, maybe it had succeeded in taking away the negative energy of the room in which she found herself absorbed that day.

She tried to remember how and when the bad feelings had started. There was a moment during her online study class when she noticed that the teacher was not being authentic or sincere when he spoke to a student. She felt the teacher’s feeling, as if it were, her own. It felt heavy. There was a loss of connection between everyone in the class in that moment as others pretended that they did not notice, in that pretence, they also became inauthentic and disconnected.

She had gone to the gym after that thinking that it would make her feel better if she exercised but unfortunately while in the gym, she had tapped into an emotion that was very bleak and even overpowering as it was a mass effect of people who became obsessed with a misaligned value driven addiction. The endless mirror taking selfies, posting to social media, posing and needy glances in seek of admiration from other gym users seemed to consume the entire gym population.

The podcast Hayley had listened to at the gym seemed to amplify the bad feeling instead of ease it. A woman advising other women, how to get what they want and how not to accept bad treatment from men. As she listened to what she felt was endless examples of where women go wrong with dating, she feared those were examples of things she had being doing herself. The podcast had advice that was all about how to get what you want to be happy but nothing about how supporting others on their journey of happiness. It was good for the ego but maybe bad for the soul.

She missed the guy she had been dating. Was it okay to even admit that? She worried that feeling the emotion would maybe magnify the bad situation of them not having spoken for a week now. This was not the first-time things had turned bad with him and she wondered was she an example of a woman described in her podcast who just did not know her own merit. Was it needy to miss him? What she really missed was the feeling of connection she had when with him. In a world where there seemed such an abundance of disconnection it was finally something that she had, that felt real.

The singing from the bar on the street which had live music grew louder and louder. The crowd cheered along. She listened for a moment and decided it was a mixture of real happiness from music lovers, with drunken bargoers deep in their journey of escapism, all chanting along the lyrics together.

She cast her thoughts back to yesterday. Her work day had gone well, she was focused and felt a sense of achievement when she logged off her computer having completed her desired objective. She had plans, that evening to meet a friend for dinner and drinks for which she felt pleased about, as it was a Friday and she would feel ashamed if she did not make any effort to be social. She was not sure at which point exactly the night turned a bit sour. Was it the throbbing ache she felt in her chest at the point in the night her friend asked her if she had been dating anyone? She managed to answer the question and quickly move on the conversation. In that moment she wanted to avoid what was really bothering her rather than risk magnifying it by going in to a full-scale analysis. Other than that, she had enjoyed the conversation. The music in the bar they were in got very loud, which put an end to their chatting. When the music went on a break, she noticed her friend’s mood had changed and between slight glances she saw a sad, displeased look wash over her friend’s face. She wondered if she had done or said something wrong but she could not think what it may have been.

Trying to make conversation during the break seemed to go a little stiff. When her friend finally said, “Shall we head home?” She instantly retorted, “Sure,” in an upbeat tone but secretly glad the night had come to an end. Her friend’s mood rubbed off on her and when she woke in the morning, she felt a bit low and dehydrated from the beers she had consumed the previous night.

As she listened to the singing from the bar outside, she felt a little ashamed of spending a Saturday night alone. The song changed and Bob Marley’s ‘Three Little Birds’ came on, as she hummed along the lyrics she thought about them.

“Singin’ sweet songs
Of melodies pure and true
Saying’, (“This is my message to you, ou-ou”)
Singin’: Don’t worry ‘bout a thing,
‘Cause every little thing is gonna be alright”

She thought about how she had spent her day worrying, worrying that she was anti-social and feeling ashamed, longing for connection and feeling lonely because she didn’t have it. The song intercepted her thoughts again.

“Three little birds
Pitched on my doorstep”

As she thought about the meaning of the lyrics, she felt that he was singing about how we can connect with nature and how it can pass us divine messages. She admired the fact that this connection with nature and the divine was open to her, just as it was to Bob Marley when he wrote the song. In fact, it was her moment of solitude that allowed her to feel this connection as it allowed her to pensively focus on the lyrics and their significance. She felt there was a divine co-ordination in the moment, that was orchestrated for her to hear the message in the lyrics of the song. Although she was alone in that moment, she no longer felt alone and realised that in her quiet moments when she listens, she can receive answers to her worries. In all that time she thought she was alone, it seemed she was really being listened to. She thought about how Bob Marley was probably alone when he felt this connection with nature, which led to him to writing the masterpiece and how that probably all inspirations for great works of art came from a connection to something greater than themselves that artists find when alone.

She put down her pen and hummed as she left the room, “Every little thing is gonna be alright.” She picked up her mobile phone that had been left on charge, she had a message waiting for her, that read, “Hey, I miss talking to you, how have you been?”

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